What a Night!

Ok… so lets try this again without accidentally typing over my whole entry and realize there is no edit undo while typing online.

Ahem.

Well, it finally happened. Last night I opened my first show as a Producer, and what a rush! Not only was there an incredible satisfaction in knowing that I had helped bring something to life on stage, but the ride was incredible. The show itself (Zanna, Don't! if you somehow haven't heard) is phenomenal and when you couple that with the talented cast and crew that was assembled, I can't help but be overjoyed. Looking back, there was indeed a lot of stress, and a lot of work (with more to come), but I realize that the stress was energizing and the work felt good. It has been a long time since I have felt that. It was great. I think that's how any job should be. I don't know what that means for me at this moment, but at least I had it. But on with the night!

The show was a success. It went off very well. The glitches are manageable and the audience was pleased. A good performance, that definitely makes me look forward to the rest of the run.

..After the show, the cast and crew assembled at my favorite bar (Bar Natasha if you have somehow missed that tidbit of my life) for our Opening Night Party. Like any event that you have a hand in putting on, it definitely had its stresses, but I had a good time. The cast and crew were having fun, my friends were hysterical, a good combination. Of course you add into the mix shots with Rae, getting closer to a new friend (non sexually thank you very much) from the cast- even if he did catch me on fire with his shot, and watching the girls reenact the swooning in "Beauty School Dropout" sure made for a fun night.

Though it was at the party that the first downer hit. A good friend of mine was hanging out with us after seeing the show, and we realized that it was the last time we would see each other for a while. He was leaving for a job for six months, and though we both knew it was coming, the moment we realized that it was the last we would see one another certainly struck home with me. Over the last half a year, we have gotten pretty close. Having gone through some pretty interesting things together as well as having an abundance of similarities (including the exact same taste in men) has made me feel really close to him. I will miss him, and it was last night that it hit home how much.

..After that, the party was winding down, and several conversations started centering around love. This of course is not entirely surprising considering that the many forms and trials of love are the show's central themes. Such conversations.. have of late left a sour taste in my mouth, and last night was no different. There are those moments where I definitely feel the void of not having someone with me, and they were sure there last night. It didn't help that several of the people that I have, or perhaps would like to make, history with were out, and people were being very… weird.

After that bar closed a lot of us went over to a club that was open later, and there the strange behavior of people went to an all new level. Some people it was almost as though they completely went out of their heads. Aggression and sexual tension seemed high amongst the entire crowd without there seeming to be much reason. Afterwards, in a completely weird mood, I saw more instances of strange behavior, and one of my friends commented that they wondered if the moon was full or something, because people were just being strange. At least I wasn't crazy. Unfortunately, weird behavior in people that you have complicated relationships with and feelings for can make those both far worse, and so it was last night. It wasn't even any specific person, but more a parade of things that I just don't understand.

I finally ended my night by taking Rae home and talking on her porch… until 6am. I could write ten journal entries with what we talked about, so I won't belabor it here, but suffice to say that the starting of the show, changes in both of our lives, and the culmination of all the weird aspects of the night gave us a lot to talk about. As happens often lately, I was glad that she and I have developed the relationship that we have. Such conversations are always great. So with that, I suppose I ended on a high note, but still… What a night!