Oh, the Cursed Tours

Oh the cursed tours.
Current mood: anxious
Category: Life

Imagine a scenario where you will consistently meet people who are by and large talented, intelligent, well traveled, and attractive. Good deal, eh? Of course, there is one small clincher: you will only have a week with them. Can you imagine the conflicts that go through your head?

My favorite bar in town- one where I go even on off nights to hang out with my friends that work there- happens to also be the most likely destination for the cast of a show that is touring in town. Since the bar is the perfect environment to engage people in conversation and get to know new people and I am a fairly social individual, it often seems to happen that I meet and proceed to get to know many people in the cast. Since they don't normally know many people in town, they are eager to hang out with people they meet, and so I normally make fast friends.

The problem comes that since this is their life; they are used to fitting the entirety of a relationship into a short period of time. They have nothing else to do outside the show, so if they make friends, you will normally see a lot of them, and chances are get really close to them, all before they up and leave town.

Even though you go into any of these relationships with this in the back of your mind, sometimes people break through, and to say that this is bittersweet would be the understatement of the year. Remember that these are national touring actors who travel all over. Often times, people I have met on tour have been the most interesting I have met in my life. Is it any wonder it is hard to keep detached?

Note that when I am talking about this, I am mostly pointing at friendships that develop. If an attraction forms, the game is even worse. You simply don't know where to go from there. It doesn't help that theatre in general and especially tours are incredibly hedonistic. Often times it is hard to tell if an attraction is right, or just right now for them. Even if something real exists, what follows is incredibly hard to figure out. A good friend of mine traveled from city to city for a girl he met, seeing her whenever he could. Of course this is an incredible effort that may not pay off, and for that matter may not even be wanted by the other person.

The problem is that on one hand making a big gesture towards love or even friendship can be a great thing. At the same time, determining the worth of that big action is nearly impossible. Gauging whether or not what you do will be well received can certainly drive a man (or woman) insane.

Ultimately, what I say is this: Tours are a recipe for disaster. Though I do have some great friends that I have made over the years from a tour, it is always hard. I cannot think of a worse combination to try and fight through. For the friends that I have, and even the ones that were a bit more, I am grateful, but looking back, it is a wonder that we ever made it where we are. I am all for overcoming odds, but good Lord, this mix is more than anyone should have to deal with.

**Note also that I wrote this while there are no tours in town. I have been dealing with this issue for years, and finally wrote it when I felt it might not implicate any specific person whom I may have fallen head over heels for... and know that they feel the same... *ahem*