2016-17: From Conflict to ...?

As we move on to the second millennium's late teen years I am struck by many things. As always as one beginning ends and another starts anew, we reflect. Through the power of social media, it is easy for people to share these reflections. Technology also makes it a simple thing to see your own reflections from years gone by. These reflections tell us as much about ourselves as they do the year itself.

Take myself for example. If you look simply at my posts on New Year's Eve throughout the last several years, one thing is fairly common: regardless of the year I've had, I'm always optimistic about the future. On good years, I feel the next will be even better. During rough times, it is a hopeful outlook towards things to come. I see this replicated by many of the people in my life. It comes as no real surprise given my love of optimism, but is still interesting to see so simply.

I see many others who want to have a hopeful view, but can't quite bring themselves to do so. Statements of: "Well here's to 2017. Can't be any worse than this year..." and the like give into the idea that things are bad, but also cling to the hope that the renewal will have a positive effect on their life or the world.

Still others focus completely on the year itself. This can be a dim view or a bright sunny one, but focuses exclusively on the past. Some of these pour forth a positive message in a time when the world seems anything but. An brilliant example of these came from the love of my life, in fact. Though it's not the way I normally express the change of the year, it is in fact my favorite type to read.

So what about 2016? Well this year is definitely an interesting one to examine. The 2000s "sweet 16" turned out to be as full of turmoil, and dare I say it, growing pains. It's almost benal, but for many people including myself, it was a year of incredible highs and devastating lows. In retrospect, I'm going to call it the Year of Conflict. As a political activist, many of my conflicts are probably obvious. For one of the first times, I found myself in actual conflict with people who in the past have held similar viewpoints. Later, I found myself embroiled in the conflict of facts vs opinions. In my
personal life, I fought against our family's economic situation. My community faced the most blatant conflict with the real threat of violence. This barely scratches the surface, but gives an insight into what I feel was a similar struggle for people throughout the country, no matter what side of any of these conflicts you were on.

To end here would place me squarely in the "dim view of the past" category I mentioned earlier. Luckily for me, there is the other side of conflict. Though conflict is hard and oftentimes painful, it does have benefits. It builds strength. The old adage of "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger" really is the truth. Through the challenges this year, I found myself growing professionally, expanding my creativity, finding love in unexpected strangers, and strengthening my relationship. I would never wish for conflict, but when presented with it, I'm glad of what I came away with.

This year, I end with a new fiancé, a new job, the framework for a fledgling company, and a solid foundation for my own novel. I will end this year, and start the new with some of my closest friends. I will laugh, and I will likely cry. I will mourn the loss of those we lost. I will feel a small tremor of fear for what can happen to the world of tomorrow, but I will look across the city with the same thing I always do, hope.

I cannot tell you what next year will be. I can tell you that we will be renewed, but we will also take with us the good and bad from this year. It is easy to say it's a clean slate, but the reality is that there is never a true fresh start. Rather than starting over this year, I resolve to bring forth the greatest that this year had to offer, and leave behind the rest. Lay down the conflict, but keep the strength, the love and do my best to make them grow. Yea, I'll toast to that.