In these last hours of 2009, I, like so many people am thinking about the year I am leaving behind, and the new time I look forward to. This year, being the end of the first decade of this millennium, I am also looking back forward to this decade of my life. It is fairly fitting time to do this, as because of my birthday, it was also the first decade of my “adult life.”
This year, I celebrated my 10 year high school class reunion. To think that I have spent 10 years out of my childhood is fairly daunting. To think how much I have changed, how much I have grown in ways I never knew I could, is just shy of earth shattering. In the last decade I have come to grips with who I am, fallen in love, had my heart broken. I have made myself a success, lost a great deal of that success. I have traveled the country, returned home, and made myself a true home somewhere far from where I was born. I have made friends that will last a lifetime, and lost many that I thought would stand by me forever. I have been loved, and I have been betrayed by those close to me.
Looking back over it all, I will have to say that more than anything, I walk away from this decade with the knowledge that will last me the rest of my life, and hopefully make me the lasting success in love and in life that we all seem to seek. This last year I will have to say in many ways was the most trying of them all. I seemed to be in constant battle with the one thing that I hate in my life above all others: stagnation.
Given the state of everything in the world, in many ways I am lucky to be stuck in one place. Many people have lost more than I have and have less to look forward to. That said, staying in place, especially when I am not happy where I am is not who I am. Given this insight into the last year, my New Year’s Resolution is going to take a different turn from the traditional, and certainly from what I have done in my past.
This coming year, I resolve to spend my energy making my life the way that I want it regardless of what is going on around me. Much of this will take place at home. Talking to people who have far more experience in the world than I do has made me realize that the saying “home is what you make it” is more true than I ever realized. I am not a big fan of my apartment, and I am planning on moving, but what I realize is that there is much that I can do to make where I live a place that makes me happy. This will be my first step. Changing things in my place, spending the time and sometimes the money to make the small changes that will make my place “MY place” regardless of where that is.
I plan on taking this same philosophy professionally too. I cannot make more work appear, and like everyone else I am dealing with a struggling economy. That said, there are things that I can do whether or not they bring in the bank that will make me professionally happy. Writing and non-profit work come to the forefront of this idea. The more I realize that I have a lot to offer, regardless of the paycheck the happier I will be, regardless of the state of the economy.
The details of these plans are still coming, and the ones I have are definitely not anything I would bore the world with, but suffice to say, this year shall end a chapter of my life, but that the New Year is not going to be one where I have trivial and easy to ignore resolutions. This New Year is going to not endeavor to make changes to me. This year is going to be dedicated instead to simply utilizing myself and the lessons of the last decade to improve the quality of life that I enjoy. I think that this will spill over into other areas of my life, and even to those that I am close to.
So here’s to a new year, a new decade, and a new road to achieve happiness. May we all find what we’re looking for.
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Saturday, October 10, 2009
Life Definitions
It has been a long time since my last post, and I just realized this will be #100! Woah. I like to talk. Well in true Rick Raven fashion, no easing in from my long break. Why not tackle the big questions!?
A conversation I have had a few too many times to count happened again today, and it made me think a lot about a much larger question.
The conversation settled around what being gay meant. This friend happens to be one of those “enlightened” gays who insists that being gay is an infinitely small part of who they are and “doesn’t define who [he is].”
Statements like this of course bring up all my standard responses such as what other aspect of your life dictates so much of your time as who you love, etc. My view has always been that the closest thing to your sexuality is probably your religion in relation to your life, but after the conversation was over, I realized that there was a much bigger argument and question to be put forth.
What exactly defines our lives?
My friend, for example says that he defines his own life. This statement is of course obvious. Unless you are a weak willed puppet, this will always be the case. So we define our own lives. But how? What measuring stick do we use? What is ok to allow to define your life?
I would venture to say that many people choose to let religion define their lives. I would say that most of us are defined in large part by our jobs. Is this ok? What about your upbringing? Your education? Are there rules as to what can define your life and what cannot?
To me it all seems pretty ridiculous to say that something can’t define a part of your life. I would say that the only time that some definition to your life is really a bad thing (even if I happen to hate it, Hellllllo Christian Right!) is when that is ALL that you are. When one single aspect of your life is so all encompassing that it doesn’t allow the vast complexities of life to mesh together to create some greater you, that is a problem. For the rest, let what you will define who you are!
Looking inwardly, off the top of my head, I can definitely say that I am definitely defined by being gay, living on the East Coast, specifically NYC, being a hopeless romantic, being a Sagittarius, having experienced an Ivy League college, and being encouraged to read as a child. I am sure that I would think of more given some time.
Now that I think about it, we may have both past and present definitions to our lives. By this I don’t mean things that don’t define who you are anymore, but rather things that are in our past that still shape our lives, and the things that are our present, and our person that continue to shape and define us. When you mesh these together, you make up who you are. I think that we all have things in our past, and aspects of our present that could make us who we are, but we choose for ourselves what will have the biggest impact. And I don’t necessarily mean events. X event will definitely cause Y which may have a huge impact on your life, but you may still not choose to let it define you. For example, being adopted definitely changed the course of my life, but I don’t think it defines me as a person.
In the end, I guess I agree in part with what my friend says. We do choose what defines our lives. We do so by embracing aspects of our lives, memories, people, places, thoughts, and ideas. Some may be huge like your religion, some may be small like who you met on the street. But our choices make this matter or not. I think that the fallacy that so many fall into is thinking that nothing defines who you are, or running away from things that might. To me, who you love is always a HUGE matter to your life. Many other things can fall into this as well. The true enlightenment is not in running away from things that might define your life, but rather embracing those things you want about yourself and learning to discard the rest and letting it fall away, making you the meshing of your own choosing.
A conversation I have had a few too many times to count happened again today, and it made me think a lot about a much larger question.
The conversation settled around what being gay meant. This friend happens to be one of those “enlightened” gays who insists that being gay is an infinitely small part of who they are and “doesn’t define who [he is].”
Statements like this of course bring up all my standard responses such as what other aspect of your life dictates so much of your time as who you love, etc. My view has always been that the closest thing to your sexuality is probably your religion in relation to your life, but after the conversation was over, I realized that there was a much bigger argument and question to be put forth.
What exactly defines our lives?
My friend, for example says that he defines his own life. This statement is of course obvious. Unless you are a weak willed puppet, this will always be the case. So we define our own lives. But how? What measuring stick do we use? What is ok to allow to define your life?
I would venture to say that many people choose to let religion define their lives. I would say that most of us are defined in large part by our jobs. Is this ok? What about your upbringing? Your education? Are there rules as to what can define your life and what cannot?
To me it all seems pretty ridiculous to say that something can’t define a part of your life. I would say that the only time that some definition to your life is really a bad thing (even if I happen to hate it, Hellllllo Christian Right!) is when that is ALL that you are. When one single aspect of your life is so all encompassing that it doesn’t allow the vast complexities of life to mesh together to create some greater you, that is a problem. For the rest, let what you will define who you are!
Looking inwardly, off the top of my head, I can definitely say that I am definitely defined by being gay, living on the East Coast, specifically NYC, being a hopeless romantic, being a Sagittarius, having experienced an Ivy League college, and being encouraged to read as a child. I am sure that I would think of more given some time.
Now that I think about it, we may have both past and present definitions to our lives. By this I don’t mean things that don’t define who you are anymore, but rather things that are in our past that still shape our lives, and the things that are our present, and our person that continue to shape and define us. When you mesh these together, you make up who you are. I think that we all have things in our past, and aspects of our present that could make us who we are, but we choose for ourselves what will have the biggest impact. And I don’t necessarily mean events. X event will definitely cause Y which may have a huge impact on your life, but you may still not choose to let it define you. For example, being adopted definitely changed the course of my life, but I don’t think it defines me as a person.
In the end, I guess I agree in part with what my friend says. We do choose what defines our lives. We do so by embracing aspects of our lives, memories, people, places, thoughts, and ideas. Some may be huge like your religion, some may be small like who you met on the street. But our choices make this matter or not. I think that the fallacy that so many fall into is thinking that nothing defines who you are, or running away from things that might. To me, who you love is always a HUGE matter to your life. Many other things can fall into this as well. The true enlightenment is not in running away from things that might define your life, but rather embracing those things you want about yourself and learning to discard the rest and letting it fall away, making you the meshing of your own choosing.
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Nature in the cities
Spring has finally come into its non-rainy fullness, and as such, I have noticed a lot about the way people react to the weather.
When I moved to New York, so many of my Midwestern friends and relatives commented on how it was to live in a city where it was all buildings and no nature. In some ways, it was a pretty valid question, as I am pretty sure that there is more concrete in NYC than in most places in the world, so of course, nature has to make way.
Last Sunday, I spent nearly all day at Central Park, and I began to think about what people had said to me, and then I started to really watch people and think about how people were reacting to the weather in comparison to how it was back in the Midwest.
This is my second Spring living in the Big Apple, and one thing that I say for sure, is that the people living here LOVE our nature. The moment that the weather eclipsed 50 degrees, the invites to come to the park started flying. Even walking by any of the hundreds of parks in the city, you could easily be overwhelmed by the sheer number of people that turned out.
As I walked around a great area in Central Park, I looked at all the people that came out just to hang out. Rich, poor; young, old; all were present. Some with kids, some with pets, some with lovers, some just alone, people were everywhere for no other reason than that they wanted to enjoy the weather and the beauty that the Park provided.
While this may not surprise that many people, especially those that live in the City, the thing is, Kansas City was NOTHING like that. I remember one day, one of my friends invited me to Loose Park to hang out and drink some wine. It was a great time, but I remember thinking at the time how bizarre of a request that was. It just wasn’t something that you hear all that often. Sure enough, when at the park, it was a gorgeous day, but there weren’t that many people present. The only places that people seemed to spend much time outdoors was in Lawrence or Columbia, where the college-town environment encouraged a slightly different attitude.
What I have realized is that major cities like NYC may seem to have “less” nature than our more wide-open counterparts, but it seems like many places in the country, it doesn’t make a difference. You run from your house to your car and from your car to your store/office/event and that’s it. When you live there, you are surrounded by more wide open spaces, but they do little good, as no one gets to really use them.
In cities like NY or Chicago, you are CONSTANTLY outdoors. You walk everywhere, and when the weather is nice, you make it even moreso. In the Midwest, enjoying nice weather was rolling down windows in your car. In the big city, it’s getting off a stop early to walk an extra 10 blocks and enjoy yourself. At least 1/3 of the restaurants here have outdoor seating. Events at a park are commonplace. Trips half an hour away to the beach are standard weekend destinations. The only things that are *standard* in the Midwest to be outdoors are barbeques (which granted, we did very well) and the very rare camping trip.
I lived in the Midwest a long time. Looking back, I can’t fathom why some of these situations exist. Is it because big cities are so much CITY that when you get the chance you hunt for nature more ardently than someone in the Midwest who has it all the time? I think that there may be some truth to this, but when the chips are down, perhaps those raised outside cities have gotten so placated with the idea that they always have nature, that they don’t really actually use it.
I will say that there are a few cities that I know have done their space well. People that live in Denver for example seem to relish in the nature that surrounds them. I know some of the Western big cities do it well too. I am not sure what it is about these cities that set them apart, or what it is about the lifestyles in these places where some seem to breed natural enjoyment while others seem to ignore it. Perhaps if some of the underlying reasoning were more understood, we could all enjoy what we have that much more.
Ah well… this is what hours of meandering through beautiful weather will get you… or at least me: a head full of ponderous thoughts.
When I moved to New York, so many of my Midwestern friends and relatives commented on how it was to live in a city where it was all buildings and no nature. In some ways, it was a pretty valid question, as I am pretty sure that there is more concrete in NYC than in most places in the world, so of course, nature has to make way.
Last Sunday, I spent nearly all day at Central Park, and I began to think about what people had said to me, and then I started to really watch people and think about how people were reacting to the weather in comparison to how it was back in the Midwest.
This is my second Spring living in the Big Apple, and one thing that I say for sure, is that the people living here LOVE our nature. The moment that the weather eclipsed 50 degrees, the invites to come to the park started flying. Even walking by any of the hundreds of parks in the city, you could easily be overwhelmed by the sheer number of people that turned out.
As I walked around a great area in Central Park, I looked at all the people that came out just to hang out. Rich, poor; young, old; all were present. Some with kids, some with pets, some with lovers, some just alone, people were everywhere for no other reason than that they wanted to enjoy the weather and the beauty that the Park provided.
While this may not surprise that many people, especially those that live in the City, the thing is, Kansas City was NOTHING like that. I remember one day, one of my friends invited me to Loose Park to hang out and drink some wine. It was a great time, but I remember thinking at the time how bizarre of a request that was. It just wasn’t something that you hear all that often. Sure enough, when at the park, it was a gorgeous day, but there weren’t that many people present. The only places that people seemed to spend much time outdoors was in Lawrence or Columbia, where the college-town environment encouraged a slightly different attitude.
What I have realized is that major cities like NYC may seem to have “less” nature than our more wide-open counterparts, but it seems like many places in the country, it doesn’t make a difference. You run from your house to your car and from your car to your store/office/event and that’s it. When you live there, you are surrounded by more wide open spaces, but they do little good, as no one gets to really use them.
In cities like NY or Chicago, you are CONSTANTLY outdoors. You walk everywhere, and when the weather is nice, you make it even moreso. In the Midwest, enjoying nice weather was rolling down windows in your car. In the big city, it’s getting off a stop early to walk an extra 10 blocks and enjoy yourself. At least 1/3 of the restaurants here have outdoor seating. Events at a park are commonplace. Trips half an hour away to the beach are standard weekend destinations. The only things that are *standard* in the Midwest to be outdoors are barbeques (which granted, we did very well) and the very rare camping trip.
I lived in the Midwest a long time. Looking back, I can’t fathom why some of these situations exist. Is it because big cities are so much CITY that when you get the chance you hunt for nature more ardently than someone in the Midwest who has it all the time? I think that there may be some truth to this, but when the chips are down, perhaps those raised outside cities have gotten so placated with the idea that they always have nature, that they don’t really actually use it.
I will say that there are a few cities that I know have done their space well. People that live in Denver for example seem to relish in the nature that surrounds them. I know some of the Western big cities do it well too. I am not sure what it is about these cities that set them apart, or what it is about the lifestyles in these places where some seem to breed natural enjoyment while others seem to ignore it. Perhaps if some of the underlying reasoning were more understood, we could all enjoy what we have that much more.
Ah well… this is what hours of meandering through beautiful weather will get you… or at least me: a head full of ponderous thoughts.
Monday, February 23, 2009
Oscar Gold!
Last night was the 81st Annual Academy Awards, and though it is indeed the gay SuperBowl, I was not that excited. The last several years have left me completely underwhelmed and I watch mostly just to see those 3 actual moments that people will talk about for the next week or two. Even with good hosts, something about the way the Oscars work made me feel like I was at a bad charity dinner- lots of interesting people doing nothing at all of interest.
This year, I was VERY pleasantly surprised! Since the winners were really not all that surprising, I want to instead talk about the show itself. Although I should note that Sean Penn’s speech was incredible, and most of the women looked AMAZING! This year they brought in new producers and completely changed the format and from top to bottom, the changes were a definite winner for me.
First off, Hugh Jackman was an incredible host! He was funny and entertaining, without simply using standup which was a nice change. He also wasn’t afraid to bring his musical background into the show, which seemed to be backed up well by the producers. This both made me happy, and of course made the show even gayer than before.
Another major change was the way that they presented the Acting awards. In years past, the last year’s winners of the opposite sex gave the award to the current winner after a small speech and clips from the nominees’ performances. This year, they pulled 5 (one for each nominee) previous winners of the same category, and each of them gave a personal tribute to the nominees. Each speech was so personal and moving, it actually felt the all the nominees were being honored, and by their peers. Several of them had tears in their eyes, and no wonder. It was moving.
They also had each team of presenters for non-acting categories present more than one award. This did several things. First, it saved time introducing people, which is always an issue. Secondly it allowed the presenters to actually carry through their personal presentation style so that nothing seemed rushed. Very nice all around.
Something else that was totally new were montages that included movies not at all mentioned in the Oscars. They did one for love, comedy, and action, and I would say at least 80% of the movies shown were all great movies that had no chance of winning a nomination. By showing these movies, it felt like they were still acknowledging their great effort, even though it was outside the traditional Academy honors.
The memorial was also made more moving when Queen Latifah sang. She was really good, looked great, and added a nice depth to the somber moment.
While all of these changes may seem small, in many ways for the show, they were revolutionary. And with ratings for the event consistently sliding, it was nice to see them finally make some changes that the audience could embrace. All in all it was more entertaining, and the show seemed far more personal than ever before.
Bravo!
This year, I was VERY pleasantly surprised! Since the winners were really not all that surprising, I want to instead talk about the show itself. Although I should note that Sean Penn’s speech was incredible, and most of the women looked AMAZING! This year they brought in new producers and completely changed the format and from top to bottom, the changes were a definite winner for me.
First off, Hugh Jackman was an incredible host! He was funny and entertaining, without simply using standup which was a nice change. He also wasn’t afraid to bring his musical background into the show, which seemed to be backed up well by the producers. This both made me happy, and of course made the show even gayer than before.
Another major change was the way that they presented the Acting awards. In years past, the last year’s winners of the opposite sex gave the award to the current winner after a small speech and clips from the nominees’ performances. This year, they pulled 5 (one for each nominee) previous winners of the same category, and each of them gave a personal tribute to the nominees. Each speech was so personal and moving, it actually felt the all the nominees were being honored, and by their peers. Several of them had tears in their eyes, and no wonder. It was moving.
They also had each team of presenters for non-acting categories present more than one award. This did several things. First, it saved time introducing people, which is always an issue. Secondly it allowed the presenters to actually carry through their personal presentation style so that nothing seemed rushed. Very nice all around.
Something else that was totally new were montages that included movies not at all mentioned in the Oscars. They did one for love, comedy, and action, and I would say at least 80% of the movies shown were all great movies that had no chance of winning a nomination. By showing these movies, it felt like they were still acknowledging their great effort, even though it was outside the traditional Academy honors.
The memorial was also made more moving when Queen Latifah sang. She was really good, looked great, and added a nice depth to the somber moment.
While all of these changes may seem small, in many ways for the show, they were revolutionary. And with ratings for the event consistently sliding, it was nice to see them finally make some changes that the audience could embrace. All in all it was more entertaining, and the show seemed far more personal than ever before.
Bravo!
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
25 Random things about Rick Raven
Ok. I am not a surveyist on blogs or Facebook, but this one has swept everyone away. Since most everyone I know has done this, I figure it’s only fair that I participate, especially since even people that don’t do surveys did this. Here are 25 Things about me.
Rules (if doing this on Facebook): Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.
1. My full name is legally Richard Warren Daniel LeBaron Sieger Raven. Yes, all 6. For reference, that is 1 first, 2 middle, and 3 last. When your family is as insane as mine is, this really shouldn’t surprise you.
2. I have more siblings than anyone I know, many of which who are adopted like I am, and I am the oldest of them all.
3. I spent almost all of my life living in the Midwest but it is my least favorite place in the world. I am an urbanist at heart, and if I can’t have my subways- preferably the 24 hour sort (get on it Boston!) and a Starbucks in walking distance, then I am miserable.
4. I love animals, but cats drive me crazy as pets. The only exceptions are the weird cats that act like dogs. Sorry, but if I am going to put that much effort into something, I want something out of it too. This is also why I don’t date men with cat personalities.
5. I believe in every line in the song Affirmation by Savage Garden.
6. I am a hopeless romantic at heart, and will always fall for the “thunderbolt” type of love, sweet small things and grand gestures, sacrificing just about anything for it.
7. Very few things actually scare me, but for some reason I have an uncontrollable fear of the sensation of falling.
8. Whether you believe that there is truth behind horoscopes normally, anything you ever read about a Sagittarius will be true about me.
9. Maybe in part because of #8, I definitely find truth in signs. I am not so big on the daily type of horoscopes, but your birth determining certain traits definitely seems realistic to me, especially since it turns out to be true so often. I also believe that your name signifies a lot of who you are as well.
10. A long time ago a friend’s dad said that he felt anyone who didn’t give at least a week of their time a year to a good cause wasn’t worth the space they take up on this Earth. I completely agree.
11. I like dorky things like video games and comic books. In fact, I am pretty sure that many skills I use as an adult were developed from playing card and video games and reading books and comics as a kid.
12. In many ways I am an incredibly motivated person and am also very motivational to others, but for some reason I have no way of making myself motivated to do something if the motivation isn’t already there.
13. I am definitely more of a visionary than a nuts and bolts kind of guy. I like seeing the grand design and greater picture of things than see the details behind how it works in the same way that I like creating something or teaching something more than I like doing it.
14. If I lived several centuries or even millennia ago, I would definitely be a philosopher. I think I do many of the same things now. I love thinking deeply about a great many things and talking about them with my friends, or even random people. I get accused of “putting too much thought into it” which pretty much is the basis of philosophy, but no one really considers it useful enough to call it a profession anymore.
15. I thrive on people. I am not one of those people who hates going to Starbucks to read, but quite the opposite. I love the energy of people being around, whether it is working or being social, and being around people gives me more energy and motivation.
16. I hate hate hate companies like Wal-Mart but totally support good big businesses like Starbucks. Treat the community, your employees, and the world well and we’ll get along fine. If not NO money from me. (I haven’t spent money at Wal-Mart in YEARS).
17. I like sweet girlie alcohol drinks, but at the same time am totally fine taking shots of whiskey or Jager if the situation arises. Nothing thus far has eclipsed a Spastic Toad in my estimation.
18. I think snow is far better than rain. While storms can be beautiful, the rain they bring never seems to be. Snow on the other hand is beautiful and never seems to soak me the way rain does. Who wants to be drenched?
19. I like every type of food, unless it has onions in it. Onions are the devil to my tongue, but the wide array of interesting food in the world all appeals to me from home cooked Italian to crazy Thai dishes. Good thing I live in NYC so I can placate all my palates.
20. On any given day you are more likely to find me in an Oxford-style shirt and jeans, though I also love suits and think that no outfit is cooler than jeans, t-shirt and a sports coat.
21. I remember movies and actors far better than music and singers. The exception is if a movie provokes no emotion or intellectual interest. In that case it will be immediately forgotten, whereas if a song moves me it will be with me forever. Movies just seem to do that more often.
22. I love art, wine, and architecture, but sadly know little of any of them. I can look at something or taste something and tell you I like or dislike it, but for the life of me can’t tell you why.
23. I don’t smoke, and never will, but am drawn to the taste of cigars, but hate the smell, and hate the taste of cigarettes but love the smell coming from another. But then hate all smoke smell on a person when not smoking, hence rarely dating smokers. Strange, no?
24. I love working out and being physically active, but when I am not doing such things, I find it hard to remember the joy I feel when doing it, which is why I sometimes completely slack off in that department.
25. I am an incredible judge of people, their emotions, capabilities, moods, etc. I can tell you instantly if 2 people are a good match for each other as friends, business, whatever. This skill completely fails me when I add myself into the equation which is why I make stupid mistakes trusting people.
Strangely, this list took me more than a week to complete. Hmmm.
Rules (if doing this on Facebook): Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.
1. My full name is legally Richard Warren Daniel LeBaron Sieger Raven. Yes, all 6. For reference, that is 1 first, 2 middle, and 3 last. When your family is as insane as mine is, this really shouldn’t surprise you.
2. I have more siblings than anyone I know, many of which who are adopted like I am, and I am the oldest of them all.
3. I spent almost all of my life living in the Midwest but it is my least favorite place in the world. I am an urbanist at heart, and if I can’t have my subways- preferably the 24 hour sort (get on it Boston!) and a Starbucks in walking distance, then I am miserable.
4. I love animals, but cats drive me crazy as pets. The only exceptions are the weird cats that act like dogs. Sorry, but if I am going to put that much effort into something, I want something out of it too. This is also why I don’t date men with cat personalities.
5. I believe in every line in the song Affirmation by Savage Garden.
6. I am a hopeless romantic at heart, and will always fall for the “thunderbolt” type of love, sweet small things and grand gestures, sacrificing just about anything for it.
7. Very few things actually scare me, but for some reason I have an uncontrollable fear of the sensation of falling.
8. Whether you believe that there is truth behind horoscopes normally, anything you ever read about a Sagittarius will be true about me.
9. Maybe in part because of #8, I definitely find truth in signs. I am not so big on the daily type of horoscopes, but your birth determining certain traits definitely seems realistic to me, especially since it turns out to be true so often. I also believe that your name signifies a lot of who you are as well.
10. A long time ago a friend’s dad said that he felt anyone who didn’t give at least a week of their time a year to a good cause wasn’t worth the space they take up on this Earth. I completely agree.
11. I like dorky things like video games and comic books. In fact, I am pretty sure that many skills I use as an adult were developed from playing card and video games and reading books and comics as a kid.
12. In many ways I am an incredibly motivated person and am also very motivational to others, but for some reason I have no way of making myself motivated to do something if the motivation isn’t already there.
13. I am definitely more of a visionary than a nuts and bolts kind of guy. I like seeing the grand design and greater picture of things than see the details behind how it works in the same way that I like creating something or teaching something more than I like doing it.
14. If I lived several centuries or even millennia ago, I would definitely be a philosopher. I think I do many of the same things now. I love thinking deeply about a great many things and talking about them with my friends, or even random people. I get accused of “putting too much thought into it” which pretty much is the basis of philosophy, but no one really considers it useful enough to call it a profession anymore.
15. I thrive on people. I am not one of those people who hates going to Starbucks to read, but quite the opposite. I love the energy of people being around, whether it is working or being social, and being around people gives me more energy and motivation.
16. I hate hate hate companies like Wal-Mart but totally support good big businesses like Starbucks. Treat the community, your employees, and the world well and we’ll get along fine. If not NO money from me. (I haven’t spent money at Wal-Mart in YEARS).
17. I like sweet girlie alcohol drinks, but at the same time am totally fine taking shots of whiskey or Jager if the situation arises. Nothing thus far has eclipsed a Spastic Toad in my estimation.
18. I think snow is far better than rain. While storms can be beautiful, the rain they bring never seems to be. Snow on the other hand is beautiful and never seems to soak me the way rain does. Who wants to be drenched?
19. I like every type of food, unless it has onions in it. Onions are the devil to my tongue, but the wide array of interesting food in the world all appeals to me from home cooked Italian to crazy Thai dishes. Good thing I live in NYC so I can placate all my palates.
20. On any given day you are more likely to find me in an Oxford-style shirt and jeans, though I also love suits and think that no outfit is cooler than jeans, t-shirt and a sports coat.
21. I remember movies and actors far better than music and singers. The exception is if a movie provokes no emotion or intellectual interest. In that case it will be immediately forgotten, whereas if a song moves me it will be with me forever. Movies just seem to do that more often.
22. I love art, wine, and architecture, but sadly know little of any of them. I can look at something or taste something and tell you I like or dislike it, but for the life of me can’t tell you why.
23. I don’t smoke, and never will, but am drawn to the taste of cigars, but hate the smell, and hate the taste of cigarettes but love the smell coming from another. But then hate all smoke smell on a person when not smoking, hence rarely dating smokers. Strange, no?
24. I love working out and being physically active, but when I am not doing such things, I find it hard to remember the joy I feel when doing it, which is why I sometimes completely slack off in that department.
25. I am an incredible judge of people, their emotions, capabilities, moods, etc. I can tell you instantly if 2 people are a good match for each other as friends, business, whatever. This skill completely fails me when I add myself into the equation which is why I make stupid mistakes trusting people.
Strangely, this list took me more than a week to complete. Hmmm.
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
To my unconventional Valentine
This year, rather than extol the virtues or reiterate the vices of Valentine’s Day, I decided to take a que from one of our local magazines. Rather than talk of love between people, they dedicated the article to something we can all (at least the magazine’s audience) agree to love: The City. Given that I have no partner to sing praises to, I decided to give my valentine to this island I live on and love oh so much.
Dear New York City,
On this day of lovers, I wanted to share with you how you have reached into the deepest parts of my soul and made me so happy.
How I love that you provide me with a Starbucks close enough to walk to no matter where I find myself.
How I smile every time I turn a corner and realize that there is something I hadn’t noticed about a street I pass every day.
How I love that your subways will always help me make my way home, no matter the hour.
How could I not be thrilled by the multitude of brilliant shows you produce and house every single day?
How I love that even within the sprawling buildings, you always seem to have room for a park filled with green in every neighborhood.
What words do I have to describe the delight I feel knowing that walking down the streets, everyone is able to be who they are without fear of reprisal?
What a wondrous thing it is that out of the millions of people you house, you always seem to provide opportunities to bump into random friends as though we were in a small Midwestern town.
And how can one not love your beauty? Fountains and sculptures, architectural brilliance, and cultural uniqueness make you shine.
Of course how can their be love without taste? Your existence ensures that no matter what my tongue wants, I can find. You can provide new and thrilling, or warm and comforting at any time.
And lastly, my sweet Valentine, I thank you for the people you bring together. So many walks of life, so many reasons for friends to visit, so many people, all brought together by you.
For this and all the wonderful things you are, and all the wonderful things you do for me and to the world, Happy Valentine’s Day!
-Your Loving Valentine, Rick
Dear New York City,
On this day of lovers, I wanted to share with you how you have reached into the deepest parts of my soul and made me so happy.
How I love that you provide me with a Starbucks close enough to walk to no matter where I find myself.
How I smile every time I turn a corner and realize that there is something I hadn’t noticed about a street I pass every day.
How I love that your subways will always help me make my way home, no matter the hour.
How could I not be thrilled by the multitude of brilliant shows you produce and house every single day?
How I love that even within the sprawling buildings, you always seem to have room for a park filled with green in every neighborhood.
What words do I have to describe the delight I feel knowing that walking down the streets, everyone is able to be who they are without fear of reprisal?
What a wondrous thing it is that out of the millions of people you house, you always seem to provide opportunities to bump into random friends as though we were in a small Midwestern town.
And how can one not love your beauty? Fountains and sculptures, architectural brilliance, and cultural uniqueness make you shine.
Of course how can their be love without taste? Your existence ensures that no matter what my tongue wants, I can find. You can provide new and thrilling, or warm and comforting at any time.
And lastly, my sweet Valentine, I thank you for the people you bring together. So many walks of life, so many reasons for friends to visit, so many people, all brought together by you.
For this and all the wonderful things you are, and all the wonderful things you do for me and to the world, Happy Valentine’s Day!
-Your Loving Valentine, Rick
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