New thoughts from unique events

What a week! Normally, I don't use blogs to describe many specific things that happen in my life, but this week was so full of new experiences it is hard to differentiate the events from the thought-provoking philosophies that they bring out in me.

I did two things I had never done before, and like most first times, they made a significant impact on me.

The first was judging for an event that I have been wanting to do and building up to for a long time. HRC in Kansas City has an annual comedy night, and we always bring in great national talent. Last year we added a great local emcee, but I thought if this were a normal show, we would have an opener. Given the amount of talent we have in the city, why not give someone local the chance to shine? The result? This year we held our first ever Comic Call, a competition to find this talented person. As I was in charge of the event, there were some unique struggles, but the big kicker was the fact that I was one of the three judges. To make it more interesting, we did it in an American Idol/Project Runway style where the judges made witty and sometimes scathing remarks. New territory for me for sure.

All in all, the competition went very well, and I think I held my own (particularly hard when grouped with a brilliant drag queen and a spunky journalist). It was interesting to see the reactions though. Some of my HRC friends were surprised I could be so "mean" while others said that I held back far too much. I guess it isn't surprising that I would accomplish both in the same competition. I will say that I have newfound respect for reality TV and live judges. It certainly was a lot harder than I had imagined. That said, I really enjoyed myself. I have always liked to have just some of the spotlight, and something like this allowed me to break out of my mold (as fluid as it may be) and do something I think I would have fun doing more often. Not a bad combination.

Last night held another first: attending a gay wedding. Let me tell you that there is nothing quite so interesting as seeing one of the most traditional events known to man recreated when you are by many definitions, defying tradition. Mixing the tried and true with an entirely new twist provides a lot of potential for amazing creations. Last night's wedding was even more unique because John and Ron may be the most creative people that I have ever met. Somehow they were able to take a Victorian Goth theme, bring together artists, actors, producers, bankers, and lawyers throw them all together and create something that was truly beautiful.

My friend Rae at some point in the evening said to me that she thought it was so beautiful because it was all about love. The ceremony and circumstance that can occasionally stand between the wedding and the reason behind it were completely meshed with exactly why we were all there. Friends and family came together, and both grooms shared their happiness with all of us. In a word, it was extraordinary. I have been to lots of weddings in my life, but none moved me so much as this one. (I can't really compare it to my brother's wedding, seeing as my familial bonds and involvement give it an entirely different feel. I love you Kellie!)

Looking back, it is hard to know where the change started. Ron and John certainly had a hand in it, but I think also that so much of the world still says that what we experienced last night is wrong, and shouldn't be done. Even those who "like" gay people still seem to hold out when it comes to marriage. Maybe when you have to work so hard to prove that you deserve what you want it forces you to make the most of it, when others take it for granted. Many weddings I go to make me feel like an outsider who is looking at people sharing in something that I shouldn't have. Last night, all I felt is that this is exactly what I want in my life and what I will have. The love that my two friends share with each other and with the rest of us is truly one of the most beautiful things on the planet. I think the priest last night may have said it best. "Looking at you, I know God blesses this union." Let those who think otherwise be damned. No matter what you believe in, God, gods, fate, or chance, you can't deny that something so wonderful isn't exactly the way it was intended to be.