The Power of the "Hallmark Holiday"

So of course today was Valentine's Day, the day of Love. Most people that I talk to constantly remind me that it is mostly a commercialized day, some even would say more so than Christmas. This may be true on one hand, but at the same time I have always believed that holidays are good things, and that a day to celebrate is nothing bad.

Valentine's Day is unique among holidays however. I do not mean the commercialization of it, but rather it's effect on people. All holidays are given power by the people that celebrate them, or for that matter the people that don't. The people that are vehemently against such days are equally affected by the day as their apathy for it creates its own kind of power. Anyway, with all holidays, they have the ability to amplify just about everything. Frustration in equal part to happiness, you can see it from the stress we create over what to do and who to do it with, etc. Holidays also have one strong fact, they lay bare those that are close to you more effectively than an average day. In many cases this can be good. Strengthening the bonds of relationships, whether they be romantic, familial, or friendship is always a good thing. What makes Valentine's Day unique is that there is no buffer to romantic part of it.

Think about it. Thanksgiving and Christmas are focused on the family, Halloween and Independence Day on your friends, etc. Though you may feel closer to your partner, or acutely aware of their absence, the fact of the matter is, you have other people and other activities to bring you a separate set of joy. Not so with our dedication to St. Valentine. For good or ill, this day is all focused on the person (or people) that you care about romantically. To some it is an affirmation of long term affection, for some it is a chance to take the next step in a relationship, or even a crush ("Be My Valentine" came about for a reason). There is simply no other focus.

The day can be full or pleasant surprises. One of the highlights of my day had nothing to do with me, but all about two good friends of mine strengthening their relationship with each other, one of whom previously held all the hatred for this day that I have previously mentioned. Watching them happily plan their night and exchange gifts was great to see, though, I must admit, pointed out my own solo evening quite a lot.

Valentine's Day has special meaning to me, because of course I am a hopeless romantic. When I am in a relationship my joy is ten-fold, of course when I am not, the awareness is painful indeed. I was taken by the power this day has. Though some family and a few friends sent their well wishes for the day, which simply isn't the point. Being single was a given, but I had hoped that maybe one of the boys on the horizon would take the opportunity to do something nice. Alas, it was not to be. This is not so much a lament, as it is just an observation about how much we can make things mean. Technically today was no different than any other (save some sporadic annoyances with multiple vehicles), yet because I have bought into the idea of what this day means, I felt pain at lacking something that never had to exist.

It is funny how you can be aware of something and do so little about it. I know that the only reason I can be bothered by today is because I let it, and yet at the same time, the values that I have in my life and the things that I want are what drive the feelings towards this day. My romantic nature and longing for that incredible relationship are not created by this day, but simply manifested by the opportunity this day creates. Though I have my reasons to be bummed, I certainly would not change the power of this day, or any other for that matter, for doing so would be saying that the things that were important to me no longer are. Hallmark may have seemed to make this holiday their own, but so long as those feelings towards love and relationships are there, it will always be owned truly by the romantics that feel its great pleasure and pain.