Patience, the Villanous Virtue

I freely admit in my life that I have very little patience. I often say, "If it is a virtue, I don't have it." So many times in our lives we are told that patience is something that is good and important. In fact, above perhaps all else, it is that "virtue" that people treasure most with age. Those who lack patience are immature, while those who advance in years tout patience perhaps even more than wisdom. Books, movies, quotes, parents, teachers... all indicate that this is so.

In many ways, this makes sense. Sometimes we need time to think about something before we act on it. When there is something that we desire, we occasionally have to work for it for a long time before it actually can be ours. Many instances on the surface do indeed indicate a good measure of patience is a positive thing in life.

But is there a price? I would venture to say that no other virtue carries the precarious nature of patience. Someone who is willing to be patient and wait for something is commendable, whereas one who waits too long is foolhardy. It would seem to me that a virtue cannot have too much excess, and yet unlike the others, patience seems to be so. In contrast to all else that is truly virtuous, there is a very fine like that we must walk with patience.

Of course such a fine line isn't enough to make a virtue even remotely villainous, but that was just to warm us up. The reason that patience is indeed the singular "villainous virtue" is because I think that more than anything else we hold to be good, patience ruins people's lives. Before I commence, I will admit that it could be our veneration of patience, not the virtue itself, that causes such havoc. Regardless of this fact, when viewed as a virtue, disaster can easily follow.

The reason? Simple. The fact that we hold patience in such high regard, we quite simply put up with things too long. This mindset that if we wait things out that they will improve is plain false. Occasionally, things improve. With equal chance, they get worse. Nothing about us putting up with them makes the difference. Wives put up with their worthless husbands in hopes they will change. People stay in dead-end or miserable jobs hoping something better will come along. Families put off going on the vacation of their dreams until things are "situated." There is this idea that if we are patient, everything will become clear, and the path will make its way for us.

It is for this reason above all others that people don't take action in their lives. This in turn churns our society to a near screeching halt and makes the average man miserable, and we all know that misery loves company. Fooling ourselves into this belief that time heals all and that we don't have to be acting agents in our life is foolhardy at the very least.

I mentioned that there is a time and a place for patience, but like anything that is a double-edged sword, it must be viewed as such. We should learn to use it when necessary, and discard it the rest of the time. Until we do that, this villain will continue to wreak havoc of our own making.