Majorly minor annoyances

Well, I am certainly glad that today is over. It was one of those days where everything goes wrong. No good reason, for some reason, the cosmic cards simply aligned against me for this day. What I realized was that it was the small things that really agitated me the most. Every business venture I have had some measure of problems today, and this frustrated me, but it wasn't what really pushed me over the edge. As I became agitated with my never-ending phone calls of doom, I thought I would get some catch-up done, so I went online- or at least I tried. My Internet provider was doing maintenance... again. Seeking refuge, I decided to play a game, but the controller refused to work despite my best attempts to fix it. Turned instead to my trusty DVDs. I still had 3 West Wing episodes to watch in season 2. Wouldn't you know it? There was a disc error that my Playstation just couldn't get past. Now in the grand scheme of things, these were just minor annoyances, but they were more than I wanted to deal with on a day like today (of course, they were part of the reason the day seemed so doomed).

It's funny how things work like that. The major issues can affect you so much less than the small irritations. It is like pain. Most people who have been in a serious accident, or felt real pain will tell you that for some reason it didn't seem to hurt all that much. Now those paper cuts? Excruciating. Maybe our brain just shuts off a certain amount of response to make things more manageable. Oh well.

I am sure that I should probably write something more, but ya know, I am just not feeling it tonight. Perhaps tomorrow. Till then...

Biologically emotional?

Good God I woke up in a bad mood this morning! I can't really explain it, but I was just frustrated from the get-go. I realized that I was very close to making everyone's day a misery, so I tried to calm down, and then after some Starbucks and a shower, I felt amazingly better. Strangely enough, the rest of the day was more fast-paced and stressful, and yet I felt completely fine. As I thought about it, I wonder how much in control of our emotions we are. How much can we change the way we feel by thinking about it? On the flip side, how much is biological? Were my initial feelings this morning the result of poor sleep, and remedied by my frapaccino, making my mood completely biological and out of my control? Or was it instead that I realized I was being a horror and wanted to calm down that brought me back to normal?


This line of thinking got me thinking about a lot of what we can and cannot control within ourselves. As if in response to my thoughts, Psychology Today, published an article in their current issue called "Cupid's Comeuppance." The reason for the article was to show how research indicates that a great deal of relationships are attributed to biological psychology, meaning of course that there is a decidedly minimum control in how we feel, and although we can choose what actions to take based upon our feelings, they are fueled almost entirely by chemical reactions in the body. If you want to read the full article, you can find it at: http://cms.psychologytoday.com/articles/pto-20040921-000001.html

I am not sure how I feel about this line of thinking. Lately, biology has become the science of choice, and its discoveries are far outstripping those of its counterparts. In many ways, this advancement is overdue. For a long time, the subject took a back seat to the rapid advancement of physics and chemistry. With the extensive research on genetics, it has been taken to new heights, and a lot more money is being thrown into it. Such money leads to research like that indicated in the article, as we search for the reasons for everything within ourselves.

I like the idea of advancing our knowledge, but I am not sure how I feel about what that information is saying about us. How much of who we are as a person can be attributed to different chemicals? Yet no matter how much I want to deny the findings, I know from first hand experience that certain chemical imbalances can change a person's personality entirely. Does this mean that we have no control?

Maybe its a little of both.Of course in order to believe that, you almost have to stretch the possibilities. If we are truly products of our biological makeup, and the brain controls the release of most of the chemicals in our body, wouldn't it be possible for us to control those releases ourselves? I don't know whether it would be a conscious or subconscious effort, but maybe if we think about it enough or desire it enough, we really can change the way that we feel by changing the chemicals that are released. Maybe we have been doing this all along and are only now just realizing it. Makes you wonder, doesn't it? All I know is that should this line of thinking prove even remotely true, then I think that we need to know more about the food we eat. How much hidden information could there be about what we eat. Chocolate is proven to release endorphins and make you happy. Turkey can make you sleepy. Is there food that can make you more sad? Or angry? Maybe some of the things we dislike about someone can go back to a bad diet. Hehe. Wouldn't that be interesting to find out.

Alright, enough of my random musings. I hope things are well with all of you, and also that you remember that I am simply ranting about random things, so only put so much stock into what you read here. ;) Well, until next time...

Current items of enjoyment

So, you may have noticed that the "currently playing" for this entry is the soundtrack to Playing by Heart. I finally got this CD just this week, after spending a great deal of time in search of it. You might wonder why I would spend so much time looking for it, but I will tell you that it was worth it. For those of you who don't know (which means you must not really know me) Playing by Heart is one of my three favorite movies. It is one that every time I watch, I like more than the last. There were several songs that made me want the soundtrack, and now that I have listened to it, I am very impressed. Like the movie, it transcends genres and styles to make a truly unique and moving compilation. The mix of jazz and pop, modern and traditional, vocals and instrumental are truly something I enjoy.

Now that I think about it, I might as well draw attention to the other entries' selections. If you haven't figured it out, I am able to select a book, music, or movie title at the begining of each entry. I like it because it allows you to see some of what I read/watch/listen to in my life. (Clicking on one takes you to the title at Amazon.com should you ever want to try it for yourself). I think its a really unique thing that adds a lot. But since we are on the subject, I thought I might tell you about some of my selections.

I should first note that I am normally going to put a book up for you to see. Obviously if I am still reading one I have already posted, I won't throw it at you twice, and in those cases, I may select a CD or DVD I am watching, if nothing else than to add some spice! I started with Dracula, which I was actually reading for my English class. Despite it being manditory, I found that reading that book is the most enjoyable thing about the class. I never realized how different the original was from all of the offshoots. I like classics, and I was glad that the class forced me to pick this one up. I would recommend it for any fans of Vampires, as it is what brought that particular entity into the limelight.

Since I was still immersed in Dracula, I next chose Affimation, a CD by the now broken-up Savage Garden. I cannot tell you how much I love this CD. The title song is by far one of my favorite songs of all time, especially since I could sing it and mean every word. The rest of the CD is in my mind amazing, and I can't quite explain why. It could be its uniquness, or maybe the emotions that it invokes. No matter what though, it has a special place in my heart.

Going back to my modern fantasy, I recently picked up Suzanna Clarke's book. I read a very enticing review that heralded the book as "the Harry Potter for adults." Having thuroughly enjoyed the entire Potter series, I of course was forced to pick this one up. I must say that it was quite a fun read, and didn't disappoint. It takes place in England at the end of the War of 1812. Unlike Harry Potter, it spends almost all of its time in the real world, making the wizards face all the prejudices and fears that we might imagine. Should you be anyway drawn to fantasy, I must recommend it.

Finally, I decided to highlight Angels in America. For those of you who have yet to see this movie, it is based upon an excellent play, and is in itself a work of art. I am sure that I have only scratched the surface of the meaning that is embedded within, but it was enough. Dealing with the very real fear of AIDS in 1985, it presents an interesting view into a variety of lives that are all tragically linked togeather. The fact that there is a great deal of depressing content, and the fact that the movie is 6 hours long (it was an HBO mini-series) I would have to suggest that you break it into parts. I will warn you that it is a bit off, but then again, in my eyes, most great pieces of art are.

Well, I guess that's more than enough writing for one night. Although I don't think I really said anything profound, maybe I gave you a tiny glimpse into the things that interest me and maybe sparked some interest in you as well. Until next time...