Mind Over the Perception of the Human Heart

The mind is indeed an amazing thing. With the right frame of mind, people can accomplish things that would otherwise be impossible or endure hardships that should break a man. There is one thing that the mind has an incredible time overcoming: The Human Heart.

The heart seems to be one of the forces able to tear down all of our defenses and break through any control our mind is able to place on our world. You can overcome a lot with your mind, but when it comes to the affairs of the heart, even those who are a master of "mind over matter" can find themselves completely ill equipped for dealing with the power of the heart.

There is another force that makes the heart and mind particularly difficult to reconcile and control: Perception. Wow. That is an amazing thing. I have often said that one person's worst day is just as bad in their mind as anyone else, no matter what their relative problems may be. Someone who has never starved scientifically feels the same way after a single day without food that someone who is constantly starving feels after missing a week. To an outsider, they seem nothing alike, but to the human mind, which can only comprehend what it perceives, they are the same.

Moving to a more obnoxious example, is when you are presented with something that you didn't have, and then you lose it. Take when you are a kid, and you think that you are going to get this special toy for Christmas. When the day comes, you realize that you did not receive what you thought you had. Now logically, you can see that there was nothing actually lost to you. Your heart however doesn't feel this way and you feel loss that at such an early age may seem incredible. The same thing holds true throughout our lives. Say you meet someone and you think that you hit it off well. You think that there is potential there. Perhaps you even agree to another date. Later that date is canceled, and there is no further progress made with that person. Technically you really didn't lose anything. You didn't have a relationship, or even a date before, but that doesn't keep you from getting upset, and depending upon the strength of your affection, it doesn't keep you from getting really hurt. In your heart and mind, you perceived that you had gained something, and feel the resulting loss. Aggravating indeed.

I like to, and traditionally do, have a great outlook on life. It frustrates me when I can logically see the reason that I shouldn't feel some specific way, but can't seem to shut off the feelings that I don't want. Maybe I am just not yet a master of the craft. Or perhaps the stronger you are as a person the stronger your heart becomes as well, and so there really is no way to ultimately win. Eh, food for thought.

Your -ness Factor

Tonight I saw You, Me and Dupree. I know, a comedy. It was indeed funny, but that isn't what I am writing about. In the movie, Owen Wilson's character (Dupree) keeps talking to his friend (Carl) about his "Carlness." He explains that it is that part of him that won't back down and makes him the person he is. At the end of the movie, he is talking to many people, asking them what their name is, and asking what their -ness is. "It's just your name with "ness" at the end of it. It's who you are.

What a great idea. This simple thing speaks quite succinctly to what I fervently believe: that you should be the best version of yourself possible. How do you do that? Now I think I can easily say that you should find your inner -ness. Each person has that thing that makes them who they are. Deep down, what is the highest form of your own essence? What is your inner -ness?

I certainly am excited to carry this thought forward and see how far it takes me.

To Motivate the Motivator

I spend a lot of my life motivating and inspiring people. I like to think that I am good at it, but regardless, I have to do it all the time. In every aspect of my work, Boys State, my political work, and even with my friends, I am the guy that gets others to do things. Whether by chance to design, that is pretty much a central thing to my life. I also have a lot of energy and passion for what I do, which seems to help me out a lot when it comes to getting things done, and getting others to do them.

So here's the dilemma: What do you do when you are the motivator, but you have lost your motivation.

I am not sure exactly what the reasoning behind it is, but I have lost a great deal of my ever-present motivation and energy. I think I really started to notice when I got back from Boys State. I was extremely motivated there, and I realized going back to the rest of my life that somehow I had lost that feeling in my everyday life.

This is not good. With my job and the organizations, etc. that I am involved in, everything is based upon me wanting to do it. As the boss of a company, if I am not motivated to make positive forward motion, the company won't. As a leader in organizations, if I am not being innovative and inspirational, the organizations will flounder. But how can you motivate yourself?

It seems funny to me that someone who has such an easy time finding what will bring the best out in others can be so inept at doing it to myself. I have tried looking at a lot of different angles, but I can't seem to find the source... something I think would be vital in solving this problem. I have faced a lot of setbacks in the last few years, but I don't think that is it. It certainly isn't that I don't like what I want to motivate myself to do. It is kind of like motivating myself to work out. I LOVE the way I feel when I work out. I like doing it. Why then is it so hard to bring myself to do something that I actually like doing. It is the same with my company. I love what I do. It makes me happy. Why then has the inspiration and motivation left me? More importantly, how can I get it back?

There is really only one thing that I may be able to work on, and that is the fact that I feel many of the people that inspire me are not in my life as much any more. Maybe their influence on me is more important than I realized. There are three in particular that I know I miss, and maybe I miss their influence on me more than I was aware of. Christopher moving and going to school has left a huge philosophical gap in my life. Brock was always good at firing me up about so many things, and Chris had a similar ability. With two of these far away and another busy building a life, we do not have the same interactions, and I think that might be taking its toll.

I do notice that a lot of people I associate with, may not bring me to the level that I like to play at. Maybe its time that I start going back to those who bring out the best in me. It's funny. I give that advice to people all the time. Maybe I should take a dose of my own medicine.

I also wonder if I have been stagnant for too long. Sitting in one place and not accomplishing something isn't something I do often, or that I enjoy. Maybe there is a place (or many places) in my life that I need a change. Something that I don't even realize is having a major impact on me. Hmmm... more avenues to persue.

Of course, there could be a lot more to this, but I think this might be a good place to start. I am sure that the results of this issue will continue to be the subject of my thoughts, and therefore my writing, but I thank you for listening while I work through this.